Assertion Training is something which we can all value from. Most of
this site is concerned with ways whereby we can be facilitated in
connecting more with our own inner resources. Assertiveness training
differs from that in that it is a social skill and yet it is a very
profound social skill which can be truly transformative. By using these
skills you can let go of an enormous amount of baggage which you carry
around. Assertion skills are beneficial to anyone who finds themselves
getting so irritated that they "blow their top". It can benefit also
someone who finds themselves being constantly manipulated. It can be
good for someone who finds themselves being too passive and is helpful
to anyone who simply wants to increase their confidence. The beauty of
it is that it is based on a system whereby each person comes out a
winner. When I first learnt it, it did feel a bit phoney and strange
and I felt a bit nervous about using it, but the wonderful thing is
that it works and as you become accustomed to using the techniques they
become natural and as you repeatedly see the good results of using
them, any fear slips away.
There are
many situations in life where we are misunderstood or where someone is
trying to manipulate us. If we do not stand up for ourselves, later we
feel upset or angry and if we overdo things and get unreasonably angry,
we still lose out. Often people also react either passively or
aggressively to a situation in the present because it triggers
something which has happened in their past. Learning assertion training
gives you skills to deal effectively with the present situation.
Assertion training works so well here because it is a situation where
no one needs to win, it is also a situation where no one needs to lose.
Learning it can therefore save us from a lot of unnecessary emotional
drainage.
My favourite assertion training book is still When I say No I feel Guilty
by Manual J. Smith. I think, but I'm not sure, that this was the first book written on Assertion Training.
Reading
this book which clearly describes the various methods which can
successfully deal with a variety of situations may be enough for you,
particularly if you can find a friend and support and share your
experiences with each other. In trying out something new, many people
find it helpful to do so with others and there are Assertion Training
classes in most towns and cities nowadays or if you are interested in
doing a course Growth Central offer a downloadable Assertion Training Workbook.